Well... I'm kinda rethinking my move to a small town. Today I was out for an appointment, and there was a ... dissheveled looking man who I would guess to be in his 50's. Actually he kinda reminded me of Hulk Hogan, platinum hair and all... except this guys hair was longer I think, and he wasn't buff and he was dirty.

Anyhow... The guy was telling the lady at the desk that he couldn't stay for his appointment because he had another appointment that he had to go to... but could his cousin ( a woman who looked like she crawled out of a dumpster) stay for the appointment instead of him. The lady at the desk said no. So Hulk went outside, then in he came again... he was upset because they just didn't understand and could he speak to a manager. Well the manager comes out and is listening to the man ( and at this point I am totally captured by this odd display) and the manager stops the man and says... "Wait, now, is this your cousin or your wife?" and the man replies, very exasperated.........

BOTH!!!!!!She's my cousin and my wife.

Well... I couldn't take it... I burst out laughing... which was very rude, but I just couldn't help it. Now I am laughing HARD, like stomach hurt kinda laugh. And this man looks at me, looks over to his cousin-wife and says "Babies having babies". Well that got me going even harder, and now Kayden (my son) is starting to laugh too. I am now crossing my legs for fear of wetting my pants, clutching my stomach and crying and not even making noise I am laughing so hard... Somehow I manage to get out the words... (this was very brazen-even for me)

"H-h-how d-do you circumcise a r-r-edneck?"

Then a young man who was also sitting and waiting, says "Kick his cousin in the chin!"

Well, now I lose it... I am struggling to breathe, I mean really gasping for air... and I'm not gonna lie... I think a little pee came out. So then the manager who is standing there with a professional expression on his face cracks a smile, and starts to giggle... yes, the manager who should stay professional was giggling. Well Hulk and Dumpster Lady stomp out, clearly offended. After they leave the manager comes over to me... which at this point I am sprawled back over the chair going "Oh God... No more.. it's hurts... no more!" And asks if I need a glass of water... which at that point was even funnier. I needed about 20 minutes to calm down before I could even speak. But it wasn't just me laughing... some of the girls in the back came out to see what the commotion was about, so the manager takeas them back and tells them... and all I know is they went back there, then about 3 minutes later, I heard about 10 people erupt in laughter. God.. that was PRICELESS!!! It is now 2 hours later, and my stomach still hurts. This was the single most funniest thing I have ever witnessed in my entire life. And there I was with out a video camera... damn!

Ma Nouvelle Maison
(My new house)

As requested here are some pics of new apartment. Soon I will add pics of the city. You can look forward to seeing a pic of the worlds largest teepee... That's right... I'm moving up in the world.











































There is also 2 bedrooms, one with a walk in closet and full bathroom, another bathroom with a double wide shower, and a laundry room. I didn't put pics of those cuz it's messy and too hard to take a pic of.















Me after cleaning my house so that I could put some pics on my blog. This is where I sit on my deck and watch the hot sweaty shirtless guys work. But now the landscaping is all done, so no more babe watching. :(

Today with my student loan did not go well... not only can i not get a grant, but i can't cash my loan, and have to pay for 3 of my classes myself ($1500). I left the school so mad, I was crying. I hate the governemnt!!!!!!!!
These guys know how i feel :

Well... I went to my school today to get started on cashing my loans. SURPRISE SURPRISE! There's a problem... I won't bother explaining it because it's long and complicated and doesn't really make sense, but it's a big one. So now here I am... no money... not sure if I'm gonna get money... I may even owe money, and to top it all off I may have to get a job to pay for my school. Why does every thing I do have to be so damn hard? I see so many people walk through life, have everything given to them, and it all comes so easy. But everything I do I have to work so hard for... I'm sick of it... I sick of it all. So here is a poem I wrote along time ago... but I think it's quite fitting for my mood right now.


Razors give you pain
Rivers are damp
Acid stains you
And drugs cause cramp
Guns aren't lawful
Nooses give
Gas smells awful
You may as well live

THIS IS ME.... DON'T LOOK VERY HAPPY, DO I?

IT'S PROBABLLY BECAUSE I'M NOT.
MY SON WAS BEING VERY FUSSY TONIGHT, SO FOR THE FIRST TIME IN ABOUT A YEAR, I DECIDED TO LET HIM SLEEP WITH ME.

THAT WAS MY SECOND MISTAKE. WHAT WAS MY FIRST MISTAKE YOU ASK? GIVING HIM A CUP OF WARM MILK TO TRY TO GET HIM TO SLEEP EARLIER.

WE BOTH FELL ASLEEP, AND THE LAST THING I THOUGHT BEFORE FALLING ASLEEP WAS "THIS IS SO NICE... THESE ARE THE THINGS JESSE (MY SON'S DAD) IS MISSING OUT ON". WELL HOW TRUE IS THAT.

ABOUT ONE HOUR INTO MY SLEEP I GOT WOKEN UP BY PROJECTILE MILK CURD VOMIT IN MY FACE... AND I KINDA HAVE A COLD SO I WAS SLEEPING WITH MY MOUTH OPEN... USE YOUR IMAGINATION. IT WAS NOT PRETTY.

SO NOW HERE I AM AT 2 AM DEAD TIRED, AND COMPLETELY DISGUSTED. JUST FINISHED SCRUBBING MY BED, MATTRESS, CARPET, HAIR ECT ECT. I THINK YOU GET THE POINT.

SO GOING BACK TO MY SON'S FATHER. NOW I AM MAD AT HIM. I MEAN WHY SHOULD I BE THE ONE WHO GETS WOKEN UP WITH NASTY VOMIT? WHY SHOULD I BE THE ONE TO DEAL WITH IT? WHILE HE'S OFF IN BC HAVING A GAY OLE TIME. GOD IT PISSES ME OFF. I MEAN I DON'T MIND BEING A SINGLE MOM MOST OF THE TIME... BUT NOW... SOMEONE SHOULD BE HERE WITH ME, IF ONLY TO SHARE THE PAIN.

SO THIS IS MY RANT... DEDICATED TO JESSE. I KNOW YOU WILL READ THIS... AND ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS YOU OWE ME BIG TIME!

OH AND WENDY... AS SICK AS THE APPLE POOP STORY WAS... AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T GET WOKEN UP WITH IT IN YOUR MOUTH AND COVERING YOUR FACE.

GOODNITE, AND TO ALL THOSE PEOPLE HAVING A WONDERFUL SLEEP RIGHT NOW.......
F U C K Y O U !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PS... I KNOW THIS SIDE OF ME DOESN'T COME OUT TOO OFTEN, AND I KNOW IT'S NOT PRETTY, BUT NEITHER WAS WHAT HAPPENED TONITE. I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE IF I OFFENDED OR DISGUSTED ANYONE WITH THIS... BUT TO BE HONEST I JUST DON'T GIVE A DAMN.

(PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard.) http://postsecret.blogspot.com

Every week I go to PostSecret. I always check on sunday, which is when it is updated. I see so many secrets that truly touch me, my heart goes out to those in pain, despair and lonliness. I laugh along with those funny secrets, and simply stare in shock at those that I could have written my self- word for word. Here is one of the many that I really connected with.



And I still beleive it. I mean this can't be it for me, can it? I just really feel like I am here for a special reason.....

GOOD-BYE MARYJANE!

Well... it's been a long road, and I'm going to miss you. Maybe one day we shall meet again? Here is a poem, in memory of one of my longest standing friends, who has been there for me through thick and thin. Thank you Maryjane, for you have helped me many a times. But now it is time to say goodbye... and I shall miss you greatly.

I am on a journey,
With no destination
And no transportation.
Mile by mile,
City by city.

I know how long I'll stay.
I'll know how soon I'll leave
But what I don't know
Is if you'll be waiting.

Day by day
Night by night
THe ocean will sway
The wind shall whisper,
And the stars will shine
As you pass on by.

I don't know where I am,
Where I am going,
Or where I'll be in between.
But I know when I get there
I'll know where your going.
And when I do get there I'll be sure to call.

So, until our paths meet again
May the sun shine upon your face,
The rain fall softly at your feet.
And when we look back on times gone by,
We'll be able to say, "Those were the days..."

Curry-N-Rice Girl

MC Vikram & Ludakrishna

Wow... it's been awhile... I have been busy getting for mymove to Medicine Hat in 4 days-Yikes!! Oh and funny how I've been so busy but nothing is packed. Anyhowthought theleast I could do is putup ajoke orsomething...so here it is. The Mystery of the English Language....

Can you read these right the first time?
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"